129 Completely Out of Touch Ways to Land a Man.

0:06 Welcome to Strange History. Today. We are going to talk about an article that was written in nineteen fifty eight and McCall's magazine. It was compiled by sixteen experts, including a marriage counselor, an airline stewardess, a psychologist, and a bachelor. It's one hundred and twenty nine ways to get a husband. So we're going to start with where to find him? Where would you find a husband? Well, you have your car break down in strategic places. Read the obituaries to find eligible widowers. Sit on a park bench and feed the pigeons.

0:45 Become a nurse or an airline stewardess. They have very high marriage rates. Be nice to everybody. They may have an eligible brother or son. While you should be nice to everybody anyway unless they're not nice to you. Be friendly to ugly men. Handsome is as handsome does. Get lost at football games. Don't take a job in a company run largely by women. Get a job demonstrating fishing tackle in a sportings goods store, on a plane, train or a bus. Don't sit next to a woman, sit next to a man. Don't be afraid to associate with more attractive girls.

1:24 They may have some leftovers. Oh my god, don't room with a girl who is a sad sack and let her pull you down to her level when traveling. When traveling, stay at small hotels where it's easier to meet strangers. Listen. This was written in nineteen fifty eight, in the year twenty and twenty three, which it is now, and this is probably not the safest thing to do. Learn to paint, set up an easel outside of an engineering school. How to let him know you are there. Stumble when you walk into a room, Get discretion every once in a while and call him up.

2:02 Wear a band aid. People often ask what happened. Make a lot of money. Oh my lord, dropping a handkerchief still works. Act. I don't know if people even carry handkerchiefs anymore. If you give it a try and it works, please let me know. Have your father buy some theater tickets that have to be gotten rid of. Stand on a corner and cry softly. Chances are good that he'll come over to find out what's wrong, or somebody will call an ambulance. Don't let him fish for your name the next time you meet. None of this.

2:34 Guess who's stuff. Buy a convertible. Men like to ride in them. Learn how to bake tasty apple pies, Bring one into the office and let the eligible bachelor's taste it. Laugh at his jokes. Accidentally have your purse fly open, scattering its contents all over the street. Oh lord, okay, how to look good to him? Men like to think their authorities on perfume. Ask his advice on what kind you should wear. Actually, that's true. All guys have a favorite scent most of the time when it comes to women. I know when I met my husband, he was like, you've got to get a bottle of poison.

3:14 I personally can't wear it. It gives me a headache. But to this day I have a full bottle of poison on my shelf that I can't wear because he bought it for me because he loves it so much. Anyway, get better looking glasses. Men still make passes at girls who wear glasses or try contact lenses. Practice you're drinking with your women friends first. If you dye your hair, pick a shade and stick to it. Wear high heels. Most of the time they are sexier unless he happens to be shorter than you. Although I don't know if you're with a guy who's shorter than you, I'm sure he's still going to think that high heels are sexy, so I wouldn't worry about that.

3:53 Tell him he's handsome. Take good care of your health. Men don't like girls who are ill. Oh my goodness. If you look good in sweaters, wear one on every third date. Get a sunburn, you know, skin cancer is a thing. Okay, go on a diet if you need to. I don't know. There's some guys who like a little meat on the bone. All right. When you are with him, order your steak rare. Don't tell him about your allergies, you know, because if you're allergic to peanuts, you want to risk that catastrophe. European women use their eyes to good advantage.

4:29 Practice in front of a mirror. Buy a full length mirror and take a good look before you go to greet him. Get that fresh scrub look by scrubbing. In other words, shower once in a while. I would agree with that one. Use the ash tray. Don't crush out cigarettes and a coffee cup. Actually, don't smoke it all. Don't be too fussy. Don't wine. Girls who wine, stay on the vine. Unless you find a guy who whinds they're out there. Trust me, I know. Show him you can have fun on a cheap date, but don't overdo it.

5:00 Don't let your parents treat him like a potential husband. Double date with a gay, happily married couple. Let him see what it's like. Send his mother a birthday card, Talk to his father about business and agree that taxes are too high. On the first date, tell him you are not thinking of getting married. Don't talk about how many children you want. If he's a fisherman, learn to scale and clean a fish when you're out strolling with him. Don't insist on stopping at every shop window. Do not tell him how much your clothing costs.

5:32 Learn to sew and wear something that you made yourself, because you know every guy likes to see a girl at a burlepsack. Find out about the girls who he hasn't married. Don't repeat the mistakes they made. Be flexible. If he decides to skip the dance and go rowing on a lake, go even if you're wearing your best evening gown. Do people go rowing on a lake for dates anymore? Turn wolves into husband material by assuming they have honor. I don't know what that means. Make your home comfortable when he calls large ashtrays comfortable chairs.

6:04 This is clearly written in a time when people still smoked a lot. Learn to play poker. If he's rich, tell him you like money. The honesty will intrigue him, because everybody loves a gold digger. Never let him believe your career is more important than your marriage. Don't tell dirty stories. Stop being a mama's girl. Don't let him think that he'll have in law trouble, even if you know he will. The cantankerous mother in law point out to him that the death rate of single men is twice that of married men.

6:35 You know, because you need to be the voice of doom and gloom. Here's some wild ideas on how to nail a man from nineteen fifty eight. Go to Yale. Just go there, don't apply, Just go get a hunting license. The next one is it's kind of weird. If your mother is fat, tell him you take after your father. If he's fat too, tell him you're adopted. My god, here we go stow away on a battleship. What a way to land a husband, My goodness, rent a billboard and post your picture and telephone number on it, because everybody loves a desperate woman.

7:11 Paint your name and number on your roof and say give me a buzz pilots again, because everybody loves a desperate woman. Start a whispering campaign on how sought after you are? So I assume a whispering campaign is when you spread a rumor about yourself and it kind of catches on. Okay, you want to become viral that you're single. I guess ride the airport bus back and forth from the airport, because apparently eligible bachelors travel a lot. Carry a camera and ask strange handsome men if they wouldn't mind snapping your picture, Oh my god, make and sell to pays.

7:46 Bald men are easy catches. I don't know about you, ladies, but honestly, I like a bald guy. I don't know how easy they are to catch, because I have girlfriends and we talk and they also like so I don't know about that. Let it be known in your office that you have a button box, and we'll sew on any bachelor's loose buttons, because again, everybody loves a desperate woman. Don't marry him if he has too many loose buttons. What does that even mean? I don't get that anyway. So that is just a few ways to get a husband according to nineteen fifty eight standards.

8:24 I hope you enjoyed this podcast. If you do, like subscribe, leave a review. Whatever. We appreciate it. Have a great day. Thank you.